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Locked out

1/18/2015

1 Comment

 
My son got into school.  A great school!  And I couldn't be prouder or more excited...or more nervous.  I knew they would fall in love with him (everyone does- he is incredibly sweet) but is the sweetness enough?  Does it help these underpaid teachers get through the rough times?  The meltdowns associated with Aspergers and other ASD's? How much can I bribe them (gift cards, massages- I have done it all) so they won't freak out when he does?

Fast forward the morning of his 1st day.  I wake up at 5:45 so I can shower, get dressed for work, attempt to put some ridiculous make up on to try and cover the bags under my eyes (totally unsuccessful) - should not have had that 3rd glass of wine last night.  Dammit.  And then I go in to wake up prince charming.  Earlier than he has ever been up in his life.  At first, he jumps out of bed!  He is excited.  Yay!  Everything is coming together.  And then he decides he is tired and does not want to go to school.  Ever.  He tells me he loved being home these last 9 weeks and does not need school.  And proceeds to shut his door and locks it.  I frantically search for the little key thing that will open the door and can't find it.  At this point, I am actually saying the words I try not to say in front of my 3 small children (but fuck it- no choice) and my wonderful boyfriend hands me a piece of Xanax and gets the door open.

At first I try talking to him about his fears and what his new school will be like and then I realize I am not getting through to him at all.  As much as our 3 different behaviorists have worked on feelings with this kid (and he can pick them out in pictures), I don't think he is going to all of a sudden verbalize them to me.  So I use the fear tactic instead.   Judge all you want- I needed this kid to get on the bus.  I told him it was illegal for him not to go to school and that I could actually be arrested if he didn't go.  Yep.  A little crazy but the kid ran downstairs and put his sneakers on.  I guess he does love me after all.

Who knew I would be a crying mess when my beautiful little boy got on the bus?  I didn't expect it.  But there it was.  Tears streaming down my cheeks.  Like he was going to Kindergarten for the 1st time.  Except he was going on a bus in crappy weather- over an hour away.  A million thoughts ran through my head- what if he hates it?  What is he gets lost getting to his classroom?  Will his teacher get him at the door?  My boyfriend was just worried that he had a bowling trip today and didn't want him to lose and throw a ball at someone.   But, he didn't and he did great.  And I am one proud mom.  I am sure these next few weeks will be filled with many challenges, but for right now, tonight anyway, I am happy.

Anyone else have any funny first day stories to share?
1 Comment
Danielle Mcintosh link
7/23/2023 11:48:11 am

Thankks for posting this

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    Author

    I am a married mom of 5 children aged 15, 13, 9, 8 and 5. Our 8 year old son was diagnosed on the spectrum at 2 years old and life hasn’t been the same since.  Marriage is hard without children, especially children with special needs.  We try and find the humor in the hard times and give each other space when we need it.  There are many times we want to throw in the towel (marriage is hard, right?)  but we always find out way back.  Together, I believe, we can make it through anything.  My husband is my rock and my sanity.  He is the most patient man I have ever met.  We divide our time between behaviorists, visiting private schools, trying to work full time jobs and every once in a while a date night where we get to fall in love all over again.  


    Raising special needs kids in not only a challenge on the marriage but for the rest of the family as well.  We do our best to keep them grounded and explain why our son gets special treatment but it isn’t always easy.  When I first agreed to write this blog, I was hopeful that I would be able to help one family.  Now I am thinking that maybe we can just help each other.  It is nice to know we are not alone on our quest to find answers, solutions, and to help our special needs kids grow up to be the best they can be.  Please reach out to me anytime. [email protected]

    Twitter: @whinetimemom





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